Merging the Multiple Me's

I've been thinking about my personal gender journey lately and have found me struggling with trying to merge the multiple parts of me into one person. Being a USMC veteran and a transgender woman has me struggling to see myself as a strong, tough woman who is feminine at the same time. I live with wanting to wear a dress and heels while at the same time, wanting to be in shape and able to kick a$$ like I felt while I was in the Marine Corps. I have started to see more and more female "action" heros in movies and TV and this helps a ton. It helps me see that it is possible. I just wish I felt confident enough to openly try and merge them. There are many women out there that show me it is possible, whether it is or one of some many other women like Jennifer Garner in Peppermint, Alice Braga in Queen of the South, or  Scarlett Jonahsson as the Black Widow, I feel that I can merge my identities into one. Had I done it so much sooner in my life, I may not be nearly as depressed as I am now.

Time to watch some more TV and movies and see that my fate is my own and I can create the person I am in real life.

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